So being an adult, I am occasionally struck by the realization that “Holy shit I can just like buy candy and have other grown-ups carry it to my motherfucking door” and then I usually send a random friend some milkduds or something.

But you know what’s fun?  Giveaways.

So I’m doing one.


  • I Don’t Care.  Seriously, reblog all you like, like it, make love to it.  Follow me, Don’t.  Don’t care.  Gonna random generate a number and that note number will be the winner.
  • This is gonna go until Friday, May 3rd.  At whenever I get online on that day.  
  • I will ship them to you from amazon or wherever.  Shipping will be to the continental US only.  I ain’t made of money.  Just candy.
  • You will get to pick the candy.  It will be a huge fucking amount.  like five pounds or some shit.
  • If I don’t like your URL, you can still win but I will sigh when I pick you.
  • If your askbox is closed or communicating with you is a pain in the ass then I’ma pick another winner.
  • when the candy arrives I want you to take a picture of it or something.  I am genuinely curious to see what a five pound bag of candy looks like

That is all I can think of.  Get some candy.